Like a pot, I am easily broken, but then He keeps molding me…..

Many times in my life, I like to feel in control…

Like the world is free, and I can glide with the wind…

It works out pretty well for me, giving me the liberty to leave the worries and pain behind…

But then we can’t always help the fact that sometimes we are broken…

I read a poem by one of my dear friends and couldn’t help but feel broken, and then have the sense of open surrender.

The piece captures it all, my feelings, emotions and what I rely solely on, be blessed as you read…

Daughter of Zion

Yeah! Yes it’s me again
Standing alone outside the rain
No one but you LORD sees my pain
As I can’t get my past outta my brain
I know I may sound like I am insane
But I feel like my whole life has been in vain

I have now made a choice
To listen to you your voice
Even through the hurt and through the noise
It’s with you I will take this poise

As it seems, today is my day
I have come out of the sinking clay
Thanks to you LORD I have found my way
But please stick to me, oh LORD I pray
Cos it’s only on you my worries and burdens I lay
So that I can step out of the box and play

Now it’s in you alone I trust
I love following you, it’s now a must
I promise to help to lift people like me out the dust
Show them the way out of their wrong passions and lusts
Thank you LORD cos it’s in you I see, all that I am supposed to be…
And now I know who I am, I am a daughter of Zion! – Victory Odunjo

N to end it all, he molds me back into place, n makes me whole again... 

Sleepy Student

Have you ever being in one of those situations where you have an appointment to go over some work with a friend or junior?

Perhaps you have …

In one of those situations,

As it ever happened that the particular student at that point is tired and sleepy but keeps begging or saying “Don’t worry I would concentrate, just go ahead”?

Perhaps they have…

Well over the last few weeks I have been taking my little siblings though their school work with as much enthusiasm as possible. I get pretty excited teaching any of them when they are all hyper, and willing to learn. 

 Well while teaching the little one yesterday she didn’t have as much vigor to learn as normal, with the claim of “I am tired”.  But irrespective of the tiredness she still wanted me to teach her. 

 I went on teaching, trying my very best to get her as engaged and involved as possible with pretty much no luck. I explained the same things over and over with “do you understand?” and many “yes’s” which proved to be no’s.

Along the line of the “lecture” I just got fed up with explaining over and over, and with time frustration started setting in, thus making me loose the vim (desire) to teach.

Well this and the anger of not being able to do what I was enjoying got me thinking, n ma thoughts went thus…

The Holy Spirit pretty much does the same thing for us ryt, being present at our every appointment with him, and trying his very best to explain and give us insight to the word of God.

But then we Christians just do what brings His spirit down…

Imagine going into is presence to communicate and learn when we are sleepy, and seriously expecting to understand and get inspired with what the Holy spirit has for us.

Imagine the frustration He gets on His face, meeting with you maybe 5 times in a week with you sleepy and practically unproductive and He patiently trying to teach you.

I aint claiming to be righteous as at this point, but getting a first-hand experience made me understand and look at things from His point of view.

But mehn He really is a generous guy….

Interceding for us in prayer after being terrible students, how many teachers will do that?

I drive at one basic thing, for us to try not to go into the presence of God, wanting to learn with an unproductive brain…

Saved by grace

When I say I am a Christian,

I am meant to be Christ-like

In actions, in deeds, and even in thoughts.

When I say I am Christian

I am meant to have all fruits of the spirit

To love, be kind, good,

Humble, forgiving, nice and many more.

But many times in my Christian walk,

I find myself falling short in many ways

Whereby the constant behavior of people push me

Or my own actions make me condemn myself

But then I remember something,

I remember His grace, which saved me initially.

His mercy, which sees me though each fall

And just God being God

And that keeps me going, and gives me the assurance.

He gives me the ability to believe that truly “I can do all things though Christ who strengthens me.”

And then the assurance that when “I call upon the name of God I will be saved”.

And that keeps me going though out, encouraging me not to give up because He would never give up on me.

That is why each time in my Christian walk I make it a point to remember that I walk not by my power, but by He that called me according to His purpose.

So when I say I am a Christian I put my trust in God to see me though it all.

When I say I am a Christian, I say I am not perfect myself, but with God I am.

Shivers

I really cannot count how many times I have started this piece without much success. Not that I don’t have the words to use, but I don’t know maybe just the constant fear and lack of confidence that I can’t do this. Anyway here it goes….

During my most recent trip after a few months, I boarded the plane in pretty much any way I would have if I was taking a trip to Nigeria. Getting into my seat, I buckled up and said a little prayer in preparation for the journey.  I lost any concern for what was going to happen on the trip, like: if I was gonna die of boredom or sleep though, when I saw I had access to entertainment right in front of me. The beginning of the journey was pretty much like any other, with instructions on what to do and not to do and bla bla bla. I zoomed into my entertainment and watched a comedy while the first leg of journey began; I went on like this for about the first hour and a half before something caught my eye.

To every other person on the plane there wasn’t anything unusual going on, but I would like to think it was just the Holy Spirit convicting me to do what was right. I really can’t say if it was cause of the constant news I had been hearing about the Boko Haram guys or the many documentaries I had watched on bombs been activated in planes. All I can say was that the constant movement of a particular man brought my heart into my throat. The guy honestly just had the look of Osama bin laden, and the way he was walking around, OMG, that was another thing entirely. I could have at that point guaranteed anyone he had a bomb on and was just waiting to activate it. My heart was beating a hundred times faster than normal and just then the little voice began to do his Job.

I really don’t really think I have ever being in a position where I thought I was going to die and then actually and practically assess where I would go just if I should die until that point. The Holy Spirit made me conscious of who I was and I started thinking, have I praised God enough? Have I been the best I can be for him? Have I given my all to him? Really, would I go to heaven? Ok, if I did would I have any treasures there?  This was my point of reckoning, where I began to check myself piece by piece, ask for forgiveness, re-surrender…. 

This didn’t end the fast beating of my heart, nor did it give me any assurance the guy was not really an Al Qaeda guy. But it gave me a deep and eternal assurance that I was secure. I don’t know how many people actually sit down in a day, assess their lives and check their purity in the presence of God. I don’t know how many people who have been at the verge of death and actually had the time to be assured at the last minute? But in those few seconds that seemed like hours, one thing I knew was and is that I never wanted to wait till the last minute to know who I was, or where I was going to be. I realized I wanted an everlasting assurance of where I was going all the time. And most importantly I never wanted to either leave God’s side or him leave me.

I know many would say of what importance is this, as it is believed that every Christian is going to heaven, but NO the reality of heaven and hell exists and the only way of ever be assured of this is by total surrender to our maker.

 Eventually, the guy ended up being a normal Ethiopian dude who had a long beard, and just liked to move around and all. I am glad the actions of this one man got me thinking again, and wanna be ever assured, and I am glad I had the Holy Spirit with me doing the job he does best….