I have a little sense of adventure in me, but in this new unfamiliar town, hmmmm I don’t know.
You know that feeling when you are between excited and nervous?
Excited because you are about to do something you classify as fun and new, but yet nervous and almost scared of what you are about to do. Well that's how I felt that hot summer afternoon.
All dressed and ready to take up the challenge the day had for me, I stepped out into the sun and smiled all the way to my destination. I was grateful I got a free ride and did not have to face the first hustle of having to find my way myself.
Tick tick tick went the hand of the clock and time flew. The initial excitement and nervousness I felt dying down somewhere in between the chatter and work, I barely noticed. Boy was I hungry. I was excited the day had drawn to a close, and almost forgot I had to find my way home myself. I “carefully” studied the directions I was to take home, packed my things and got ready to go.
Pushing away all the nervousness that seemed to have built up again while planning my trip back home, I alighted from the vehicle and found myself in the train station, surrounded by many signs which seemed familiar from movies, but too unfamiliar in the physical. Ohhh my gawd, I almost wanted to run and hide. But as we always have it, I gave a bold face and walked “boldly” to the customer care lady, and with my “highly sophisticated” English, I asked where I was to get a ticket for the next train.
I know it seems easier than I have it written, but the reality is that I wasn’t sure of my final stop. I thought it was Stenton but all around I saw Trenton and I simply assumed it was one and the same, after all the only difference in pronunciation and spelling was the “s”.
Feeling a little confident, and believing I knew my final destination, I bought my ticket and walked on to the train line to get on my train, but mehn I had this gut feeling that just wouldn’t go. It was almost like my heart was beating out, and all because of what... one ordinary train.
Overhead announcer: “We are sorry to inform you the train has been delayed and bla bla bla”
Thinking of it now, I won’t be too surprised if that delay was because of me, because it did save me a trip to another state. I took a closer look at my ticket considering the uneasiness I felt in my spirit that didn’t want to enter the train, strolled back to the woman at the counter and told her the address of where exactly I was going.
It appeared there and then that the gut feeling I had was right, which I can say is my spirit as I was a few minutes away from taking a wrong train out of town. On getting the right information, I changed my ticket and walked joyfully to the right train with little or no feeling of anxiety or worry. I may not have realized then, but I did learn a significant lesson.
Our lives as Christians are often times depicted as my little destination palava (problem), where we think we know the specific direction we are headed, but we really don’t. “Many are the ways that seem right to a man, but the end thereof is the way of death”- Proverbs 16:25.
We often find ourselves in certain situations we think we have the strength to run through, but realize along the way the errors of our thoughts. These situations or scenarios often get us so bashed, we feel sick in our hearts and spirits like I did with the gut feeling.
I know we’ve probably read or heard a million or gazillion times, the verse: “if any man lacks wisdom let him ask of God who freely gives”- James 1:5. Wisdom in this sense, doesn’t necessarily mean the most majestic knowledge, but can be related to the littlest things like getting right advice. I walked up to the counter initially with a certain air of confidence, hoping I knew where I was going. If only I took my time to search, then i would have realized I was not too sure.
In our growth as Christians, we tend to experience situations where albeit we try to understand somethings, we end up with little or no understanding. We carry our heads up high so no one looks down on us, and thus ignore the feeling in our spirit. I am no saint and I admit to have done this on different occasions, but understanding the role fellow Christians play in our lives can indeed put us through our mystery and help us grow faster.
I am an adult, and anyone would wonder why exploring a new city or even taking a train should call for attention, but it’s just to make me understand that though I think I know a lot of things most of the time, I could be wrong and require help to get back on the right track.
The simple feeling of knowing I was finally going on the right train made me breathe out a heavy sigh I did not know I held in. We as Christians often times don’t admit the weight we hold on to when we hold unto uncertainties, and until we learn to ask for help or advice from those around, we don’t get to really experience the many things the word of God promises us.
I am fully aware of the fact that our Christian growth is more of a personal thing, but I am also aware of the fact that God put in place leaders ahead of us for a reason. Jesus and his disciples are the best example, they showed how they learned from each other by asking questions, and therefore set an example for us to learn from one another. The bible says “ask and it shall be given unto you…” (Matthew 7:7), asking doesn't have to be just the huge things we think we deserve, but even the little things we are uncertain about.
My one day trip as a JJC(new comer) in this train station has enlightened me a little more. I haven’t lost my sense of adventure, neither has my confidence reduced. Be that as it may, I have realized that even with my high level of confidence and adventurous nature I still need help sometimes. This in effect means although we have things that rock us as Christians, the desire to press on should be ever present. We weren't created to be perfect, hence our imperfection... So we should not look down on ourselves and back out on certain reasons, but persevere and show that we are overcomers.